Mental Block

Its Saturday evening and I was just browsing through my emails. Thinking I should answer some of them and that I should write something. But it seems in the  last week or two I have developed some sort of block in my brain that doesn't allow me to write anything.
                    The last I wrote I was all excited about this new job that was supposed to have started a couple of weeks ago. Well it still hasn't started. Why?I don't know. I don't really care  other than I thought I had some direct leading from God. Well , now I have about a thousand questions running though my mind. Was it really God moving this direction ?  Seemed like it . As you read in my last couple blogs everything just fell into to place, I thought , except for the main thing the job. Still hasn't happened. Why?   I don't know, these guys call me almost everyday and say they're ready to meet then an hour later they call and have some excuse why they can't . I don't even call them . I haven't called them once. But they keep on. I don't know what to think. Then of course there is my old boss telling me to come and get the tools from CA. I would love to run down and get them but again you have to have money.
                  Where does that leave me , no clue. I talked to some friends that thought it was a test from God. I do believe that for sure. I'm not sure what the test is , even. I going with trusting God to show me.
                 I know my whole life was spent making sure I always was making money . If I ran low I wasn't working hard enough. Does God want me to learn to trust Him for it? Could be . Where do you draw the line between trusting God and being lazy ? Sure I can stay here with mom and take care of my gardening projects and spend lots of time in studying God's word. But why all the stuff about the job that I wasn't looking for anyway? I'm so confused. If anyone has the answer please send it right away. : )   Yes I have very little patience , maybe that is it. ?
                      I guess for now my plan is this. Wait, study God's Word more , pray more, and see if there is more in my life that God wants me to align with His will.  I'm sure there is plenty of work to be done there.  One place I was reading just a while ago said that in order for me to better understand God's will for my life I first must understand His purpose for my life. So my next little side study will be what is God's purpose for my life. Again suggestions would be of great help here.
                          So my new job is somewhat or indefinitely on hold. Maybe know more next week. Who knows. Do I really want to spent 30 or 40 hours a week working ? Instead of doing God work? No, but could I possibly do both?  I'm waiting to see.  Please pray that I will do the right thing.  Like I've said before I truly believe I won't be happy unless I'm in the center of God's will. If I only knew where that was right now.  
                                           Hoping and Praying God's Will is accomplished.